Humility In God's Timing
Mackenzie Pitts // UNG Student & Kids Intern/Intern Coordinator
Living and growing in a college town where both your environment and the people around you are constantly changing can be hard when you seem to be constantly staying the same. God’s timing is a concept I’ve been struggling with lately and with that has come an abundance of humility. The Lord’s timing and plan for my life is unique to say the least, not reflecting what’s typical in the world. I’m 22 years old and I won’t graduate in four years, maybe not even five, I won’t get married after four years of college, and I won’t get to start my desired career at this young age. Coming to these realizations has left me questioning myself and God. When will it be my turn? What’s wrong with me? Has God forgotten about me? Has everyone else forgotten about me? Along with these doubtful thoughts have come extreme thoughts of pride. Aren’t I great too? Don’t I deserve this or that? Haven’t I waited long enough? What do I need to do to get that?
In Mark 10, James and John leave the other disciples to approach Jesus. Confident in their own greatness, they ask Jesus to sit at His left and right hands in heaven, sharing in His glory. They didn’t want to share support in His suffering, they wanted to be famous. I’m reading Humility by CJ Mahaney right now and this quote is constantly circling in my head: “Can you see yourself in this story? It’s easy for us at times to disdain the disciples and fail to recognize our face in their portrait. They argued on the road about who was the greatest; we may not openly argue about this, but don’t we engage in the same debate everyday in our private thoughts? If you’re like me, you compare yourself to others and look for opportunities to claim greater importance than them, just as the disciples did.”
When comparison creeps in and plans to steal all my joy, instead of turning to prideful, woe-is-me minded thoughts, I turn to gratitude. If I was on track in school to graduate in four years, summer classes included, would I have had the opportunity to spend the summer in Boston last year? Would I have the opportunity to go back this year? The answer to both, especially the opportunity this year, would be no. Would I have the opportunity to intern for a fourth year at Watkinsville in a brand-new ministry area, allowing the Lord to take me out of my comfort zone and challenge me in new ways? The answer is also no. Would I have the opportunity to live with some of my closest friends in August if I was getting married? Again, no. Would my relationship with Jesus have been crafted the same way if my life reflected the typical timeline? I genuinely feel like I wouldn’t know the Lord the way I do if my path to where I am right now would have been even the slightest bit different.
If I can so clearly and tangibly see the ways the Lord has orchestrated the things of my life in the past, why do I doubt Him now? Just because some big life stages are coming up, He’s going to leave me now? If I can look back and thank God, shouldn’t I be able to look forward and trust God?
Lamentations 3:21-23 says,
“Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this: The faithful love of the Lord never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is His faithfulness; His mercies begin afresh each morning.”
This life is not about me telling God what I want my life to look like or placing expectations on His plans for my life. He has proved time and time again how much better His plans are than mine. Is this the time I’ll finally grasp that? What a humbling way to realize that I will never be able to answer those doubt filled questions when I want to exclude God as the Creator of my life.
The purpose of pride is to rob God of His glory and to pursue self-glorification for ourselves. In essence, we are depriving God of something only He is worthy to receive. No wonder the Bible repeatedly emphasizes how much God opposes pride.
“When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom” Proverbs 11:2
“In your relationship with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death- even death on a cross!” Philippians 2:5-8
These verses in Philippians exemplify true greatness displayed by Jesus. When He was sent to earth in human form, He could have taken on the role of God planning to be served by all. Instead, He Himself came to serve. This is what life is all about. It isn’t about timelines or what I think is best for my life within a certain time frame, it is about exemplifying the true greatness of Jesus. God is the only one worthy to receive our lives wholehearted on display for His glory.
One of my favorite worship songs is “Run to The Father” by Cody Carnes. The line the Lord constantly places on my heart is, “I don’t have a context for that kind of love, I don’t understand, I can’t comprehend, all I know is I need You”. It’s a gift to know that God’s goodness is completely and utterly independent of my response to it. He’s good because He is, not because I’ve done anything to deserve it.
God’s timing is meant to protect me, to guide me, and is used to help me grow my dependence and trust in Him. I need to step aside and let God be God. Praise God that I don’t have the power or sovereignty over my own life.
Mack is a fourth year secondary math education major at UNG. She has been a kids intern for 3 years and got to be an intern coordinator this year! She is also involved in the Fagan/Martin tribe, went to Boston last summer, and is going to Boston with Watty this summer. In the fall, she is planning on interning with the youth!
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